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"Bachelor" Blog: The most awkward "Bachelor" ever

by Christie Humphries

kvue.com

Posted on February 6, 2012 at 11:01 PM

Updated Tuesday, Feb 14 at 11:07 AM

I don't know what made me more uncomfortable -- Casey's crying or Jamie's frontal mount. Either way, this was the most awkward "Bachelor" ever!

Apparently Miss Casey S. has a secret lover back in Kansas, and Chris Harrison would not stand for anyone making a fool of Ben. He would much rather make a fool of Casey. According to Chris, three different people revealed that Casey was still in love with an old boyfriend, and if she wasn't really open to finding love with Ben, she should go home. Casey painfully admitted that she still had love for her ex, but he had no intension of marrying her, so she chose to go on the show in hopes of finding love with someone who was not afraid of commitment. In typical fashion, Chris told Casey that he called her ex and he said they were practically living together, which of course played with this girl's head. You know he's probably one of those guys who doesn't want her, but doesn't want anyone else to have her either. So Ben says she should probably go home and figure it out. This entirely orchestrated scene was only made worse by her whaling sobs. It was really uncomfortable to watch and even more uncomfortable to listen to.

All of tonight's exits were awkward. The one-on-one date with Rachel and Blakely involved a lot of uncomfortable dancing followed by Blakely showing Ben her hand-crafted scrapbook of memories. I'm not sure who brings a glue stick, scissors, and colored paper on a dating show, but Blakely is definitely crafty. I'm sure Ben thought it was really sweet, but it wasn't enough to keep Ben from sending her home. She was so ridiculously over-confident; you knew she was going to fall apart. The moment he gave Rachel the rose, she went running. We all knew she had some horse teeth, but who knew she'd trot off so quickly. Ben had to chase her down to make sure she knew how much he appreciated her embarrassing herself.

Awkward exit number three was poor Jamie. Frankly, I had to look up this girl's name. There is always one girl that sneaks through without ever really having any face time on camera or true connection to the bachelor. This season that was Jamie. But Jamie would not go quietly; she was determined to go out with a bang. She wanted to show Ben that she could be fun and exciting too. So she full-frontal mounts the man in her red mini dress and begins to try to give him a kissing lesson. Please keep in mind this is the first time they have ever kissed. The whole thing was like a bad dream where you show up to school in your underwear. I just wanted to run and hide and try to erase the scene from my memory. Even Jamie knew it was over. Why couldn't she have just walked away with some dignity? Up until that moment no one even knew who she was. Now she will always be remembered as the girl who climbed into Ben's saddle and got bucked off.

The final awkward moment wasn't even an exit; it was actually the one-on-one with Kacie B. where she tried to explain to Ben that the reason she is so mature and doesn't relate to other girls her age is because she had an eating disorder in high school....huh? Normally when someone talks about their parents catching them in the act, they are referring to sex not throwing up. I know that a lot of women suffer from these issues and they are serious, but it wasn't exactly something that I thought she had to talk about on the show or over dinner.

The show could not have been complete without the group date -- a topless Courtney and Ben in a loincloth. I'd get into more details, but just thinking about it is now making me nauseous. Let's just say there was a village in Panama and a bunch of half-naked people in huts. When in Panama...be a hoe. That's Courtney's philosophy. I'll be glad when that girl finds some self-respect and an exit. Maybe she'll go skinny dipping again and be eaten by piranhas.

Tune in next week as Ben gets one week closer to ending our misery.

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