Sean Lowe’s - Better Start Improving Season of The Bachelor
Posted on January 10, 2013 at 6:43 PM
Well I’ve eliminate Ashley as a possible baby name. Apparently there are WAY too many running around and way too many on this show. Three Ashley’s, two Leslie’s, and a bunch of other crazy women trying to shake things up this season on The Bachelor. Sean decided to shake things up as well. He was extremely generous with the roses and he decided he wasn’t waiting for the rose ceremony. He gave 12 away before the cocktails were even served! This was a Bachelor first. I think my favorite part was when Chris Harrison said, “As for the rest of you…” and the camera panned to an image of the most miserable looking women I’ve ever seen. Most were sweaty and drunk and looking like sad little puppies hoping to get adopted.
Usually when the season starts, I have to make notes next to each girl’s name to keep track of who they are. For the first time I’m going to share some of those notes with you. You can decide if you felt the same:
Selma = Ashley Greene
Kelly - looks like a Cheetah Girl. Hobbies include singing and hair extensions
Katie – Barefoot Yoga Instructor – No thanks
Ashley P.– 50 shades of …hey put down the cocktails and put away the tie
Taryn – Doesn’t watch the show but knows how to cry when she doesn’t get attention.
Robyn – Enjoys gymnastics but fails at it publically
Lacey - looks dumb
Paige – looks abrasive. Bachelor Pad reject
Sarah – Sometimes one is all you need
Tierra – Love at first sight. Open heart tattoo on her ring finger = secret stalker
Amanda – Model who enjoys silent pauses and has LOTS OF TEETH
Desiree – Pennies in a fountain. I hope your wish was for your bangs to grow out
Lesley M. – Uses football to check out your ass
Kristy – Model who thinks she’s the “Best from the Midwest”
Lauren – Italian Lady Gaga
Lindsay – Princess Bride
I think Sean is going to need more than just Arie’s help to come up with some creative ways to dump these women. You can’t just “stop texting them” on the Bachelor. I think he should put the bottom 5 on a plane to Vegas and not tell them until they get there that he’s not coming, but set them up for the weekend to take away the sting of being rejected. Who knows… maybe one of them could get lucky on the slots even if they aren’t lucky in love.