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All Frogs Go To The Bermuda Triangle

by Christie Humphries

kvue.com

Posted on June 4, 2012 at 10:03 PM

I’ve been trying to figure out Emily’s strategy and I think I finally have it. She’s kissing a lot of frogs…and I mean kissing and kissing and kissing…trying to find her prince. I’ll give her credit for acknowledging that if she were a man, it wouldn’t be an issue, but sure enough the first time she kisses Arie in front of Ryan, his macho ego gets bruised and he tries to give her a talking to about her image. I hate to break it to you Ryan, but The Bachelorette isn’t exactly the best platform to establish role models for young women. And I have to say Ryan…you’re not much of a role model either. I’m afraid the only “Bachelor” you’re going to be selected for is “Bachelor Pad” when Emily finally kicks you to the curb. You may be pretty to look at, but you are ugly to listen to. I have issues with a man who says he “never makes the first move”. Really Doug?!! What’s that all about? I mean you are the man aren’t you? The man is supposed to make the first move. Besides…Emily already made the “move” by giving you a rose. Man up and give the girl some lip already. I can’t figure Doug out. I feel like he is so scripted. He doesn’t even seem real. Who says that their worst trait is that they spend too much time with their kid and washing their ex-girlfriend’s car? Whatever! He’s like a musclier and hairier version of a 12 year old teacher’s pet. And why does she keep Kalon? I think that dude is gross. His personality is weak at best. I picture him spending hours in his closet lining up all of his shoes and organizing his shirts by color…pink, light pink, pastel blue, lavender…yuck! Have an apple martini and go back to where you came from. I hate to say it, but I think Emily got a weak bunch of dudes. They should stop wasting so much time arguing over who’s the oldest and wisest of them all and get down to some good old fashion arm wrestling or something. I don’t think I can stand to watch another 2 hour episode just to see two random dudes crying in the rain over a girl they have barely spoken to.

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